Back to Simplicity

In preparing for my move to Hawaii, I have been releasing a LOT of things.  It’s amazing how easy it can be to accumulate so much stuff over time.  There were some beautiful items stored in my garage that bared no emotional attachment for me that someone else could have been using all these years.  And the books!!! Oh my gosh!  How many books does one person need?  Especially when there aren’t enough shelves available for them all.  And, again, many MANY others could be enjoying.....and now will be.  

This process has led me to contemplate some of the impact of our culture’s tendency to hoard stuff.....even if on a micro-scale.  How does it effect us as individuals? As a society?  Can it be one of the areas that hold us back from experiencing our fullest potential?  ‘They’ say clutter represents clutter of the mind.  Does it matter if the clutter is visible?  What if the closets, cupboards, file cabinets and garages are full?  It’s still clutter.....just well hidden.  And what about the ecological impact of all of our collective stuff?

This experience also led me to recall a ‘freedom’ mantra I had years ago.  It remained my mantra until I gained a strong sense of freedom in multiple ways.  Yet, now, as I release so many physical things I am beginning to feel a new and deeper sense of freedom.  I still have things to release and still maintain a sense of attachment to some stuff.  Yet, if some of those things were lost, it wouldn’t be devastating.  I may be sad and may even mourn it a little.  Then I’d move on, or perhaps I would create something even better than what was lost.  Things don’t matter nearly as much as people and relationships do.  

Any thoughts and further insights shared would be appreciated.


By Tonya Tyler

Thought Paper on Change

I typically love change.  However, I tend to either thrive in it or feel paralyzed from the thought of its impact. There are areas that I have felt fear of change although I wanted it.  During those times, I simply tend to hold off on making a decision or have a lack of activity.  There have been times I wanted change so badly but had such mixed feelings about it that the true desire was to be forced into the change.

When I was married, I had not been very satisfied with my relationship with my former husband for quite some time.  I was very committed to the idea of staying married. I never would have made the first move to separate.  When he first asked for a separation I felt devastated but looking back, my devastation was more about the ideal of staying married and the thought of how our divorce would affect others.  At one point, he made a comment that he thought that our separation was the best thing for me.  Although he may have been using that as an excuse, he was right.  It was the best thing that could have happened for me at that time.  I had lost myself in him and focused on helping him obtain dreams, leaving mine behind.  I have many enjoyable memories and experiences I wouldn’t trade but am so happy he originally asked for the separation.  

So many people feel great stress when going through a lot of changes.  I sometimes wonder if it’s because of the change or because of the collective consciousness that we have created around how stress is ‘supposed’ to affect us.  When my former husband and I separated, I moved out of the house.  Shortly before that my grandfather had passed away.  There were several other major changes I had gone through.  However, I was loving life and felt as though I was thriving and flowing in life.  At an office training, someone came in to talk about stress and gave us a test.  My test reflected that I was under the maximum amount of stress one should endure, yet I was loving life and not feeling overly stressed.  Shortly after getting those test results, I started to feel the impact of the stress.  Was it the stress or the power of suggestion about how stressed I was ‘supposed’ to be feeling that caused my stressful feelings?

I was also working a job I didn’t enjoy very much.  I enjoyed that it appeared to be making a significant difference but felt chained to something I had no passion or love for.  I had wanted to leave for quite some time but wouldn’t quit.  Again, I thought about how it would affect those around me.  I had been there for a while and was taking on a couple more tasks that the president had always done. On a couple of occasions I joked with the president about me getting fired; and I always said I would thank them.  Eventually, I did get fired, and I did thank them.  My colleagues and supervisor were disappointed that I didn’t fight for my job.  I didn’t even really know or care what I was being fired for at the time and found out later it was for something I didn’t do.  The president was supposed to retire the following year.  I found out later he stayed on a few more years.  I sometimes wondered if I would have stayed if he would have been able to retire when he originally planned.  His successor was not able to do some of the tasks that I was taking over for him. 

Now, eight years later, I am at another pivotal moment of change being greatly desired, yet I’ve gone through moments of sedentary behavior, feeling like I don’t know what to do.  Other times I’ve felt as though I’m wasting time with some of the tasks at hand.  At yet other times, I feel I am making a significant impact in the lives of those around me and feel I am in my right place at this time in my life.  For quite some time I have been feeling as though a significant change is coming in regards to money.  That is definitely the area I need and want the change the most in life.  I’ve had brief moments of feeling as though I am waiting for this change to occur, yet I know there are things I need to be doing to prepare for such a change.  I also realize that it’s more important to enjoy the journey I’m currently on than to simply feel as though I am waiting for something better.  It’s interesting that even the simple thought of change can paralyze us or thrust us forward into the next stage of life.  

By Tonya Tyler

Written August 19, 2010

Let's choose to thrive with change like butterflies!!!

Thought Paper on Faith

Faith is both innate and nurtured.  I believe it initially comes from a seed that was planted by our Divine Source to help us, guide us and direct us. Yet it is developed and strengthened over time through nurturing it.  It is something that can waiver at times and be held firm at others.  One of its function in life is to allow us to live worry-free and in a state of peace and harmony.  When we live in faith we live in the flow of life and all works out as expected or better.  When it waivers and we live in fear we can wreak havoc in our lives or at least in our minds.  But isn’t that where it all starts, in the mind?  Heaven or havoc.  They each start with a state of mind that begins with living in either faith or fear.  

With faith there is clarity, no confusion.  Faith is a strong belief in something that is unseen.  What we think of as the polar opposite is fear, which is really faith misplaced.  Faith and fear are the same emotion, one is simply of light and positive, while the other is of darkness and negative.  

Faith is living in trust that all is working in Divine Order.  And that even in the most trying of times you can still have an optimistic view and knowingness about a situation.  I believe faith gets stronger as judgments get smaller; when we can simply see things as being, instead of as good or bad.  Faith directs our actions and our actions strengthen our faith.  Faith without action is simply a fantasy that will stay as such.

As stated in the Science of Mind book, pure faith is a spiritual conviction; the embodiment of an idea, and acceptance of a concept.  Seeing results through staying in a positive prayerful state and acknowledging one's connection to Source often will strengthen faith.

By Tonya Tyler

Written May 12, 2010

Information Revealed with a Grateful Heart

Ten years ago while in the Catholic Church, it was revealed to me through meditation that Jesus was part of a brotherly order that eventually became known as the Freemasons.  (side note:  I do not know this as a confirmed fact...it simply was revealed to me) I became intrigued and secretly studied them for a time.  I kept it a secret at that time because I was caught up in what the masses helped lead me to believe......that they are evil and about power and control.  I even got angry at Jesus for a few years believing the same was true about him.  I am grateful new information has been revealed to me recently through both meditation and meeting masons.  I am also grateful for the divine order of occurrences in my life. 

A few years ago, I was invited to a mason’s retirement center as as a vendor for their staff’s health and wellness day.  I had a hypnotherapy booth.  On that day, I discovered there is a female-type version of the order.  That made me feel a little better about them.  I didn’t really like the fact that masons exclude women, yet I now know and accept that it is a long-held tradition.  I also came to understand that the women could only be members of their order by being related to a mason.  So....I let the idea leave my mind as I knew of nobody in my family that is or was a mason.

During the summer of this year, my son and I went on a family vacation with my dad and stepmom (my brother and his new girlfriend joined us for part of the vacation as well).  Anyway, at my grandfather’s gravesite I saw both the Mason and Shriners symbols on his and his brother’s tombstone.  I only met my father’s father twice and one of those times I was a baby and do not remember.  I knew he was a Shriner...but didn’t know that one had to be a Mason before ever becoming a Shriner.

Shortly after that vacation was the annual Hafif Foundation Concert Under the Stars....an event I have treasured attended for the last several years.  I had gained so much internally and have been inspired from attending these concerts that I wanted to give back and asked what I could do to help.  The Foundation’s director, Burnis, connected me with Jayna who does much of the coordinating of the event that gives back to so many!!!  Through our visiting, I discovered that she recently joined the Eastern Star, the name of the women’s order.  I shared with her my interest and that I recently found out that my grandfather was a member when he was alive.  She introduced me to Caroline, another active member, who shared more with me, and I was invited to complete a petition to join.  

Through that process, meditation and what I will call divine providence, I feel as though being a member is now a calling in my life.  I feel so honored to feel as though I am carrying on a family tradition, both as someone who gets to carry on part of her grandfather’s legacy, and in some sense Jesus’ as well.

Even with that said....I still know very little about them and had a couple of concerns based on misinterpretations from the masses that I wasn’t sure were true or not.  I was ‘mistakenly’ invited to a meeting to be initiated a month early.  I decided this was simply part of my initiation process and that I would use it as a time to serve in whatever way I would be allowed.  I also used it as a time to learn and ask questions to alleviate any of my concerns.  During the meeting and other initiations, Bill Rook was appointed to stay out with me to ‘entertain’ me.  He and several women have answered my questions and have added to my sense of honor and pride in now being counted among them.  

Through my inquiry, and as I suspected, I discovered that the truth is that the members are there to serve and empower others.......just as Jesus came to do.  Jesus lived, in part, to empower us to learn who we each truly are as divine beings and to tap into that part of ourselves.  He taught us that each of us could perform the miracles he did and even more.  

I also learned, as suspected, that the teachings of the Masons are open to anybody who want to learn of their esoteric knowledge.  It’s not really a secret as much as it is sacred teachings that each member learns at their own pace as they are ready (or maybe I am getting my other esoteric teachings confused with this - - admittedly I am a newbie in the order).  I also learned that for women who want to be a member but do not have a connection through marriage or biological family that there is a willingness to help research to find a connection.  How lovely!  It is much more open than I initially thought, still with beautiful and sacred teachings that are not open to everyone but THAT fact simply adds to the specialness in my mind.

I should also note that if all of the founding father's of our country except three were of the order.....it can't be all bad.  The United States is an amazing country to live in even with all of our faults.

I am very honored and proud to be a new member of the Eastern Star.  I am also very grateful that my son is allowed to attend tonight’s installations for the incoming officers. 

What Collective Conscious Thoughts Have You Gotten Caught Up In?

There are many thoughts we carry as groups of people.  Is this another indication of our oneness?  Sometimes they are easy to recognize.  Other times we have them and don’t acknowledge they are part of the group think.  I am not saying they are all bad.  Actually I will avoid judging them as best I can.  We each simply make choices as to which ones we want to accept for our lives.  Well....at least perhaps the choice can be made once there is an awareness that it is a collective thought.

Questions that come to mind related to this topic.....is it more important to be a free thinker or group thinker?  How quickly can you catch yourself being caught up in a collective conscious thought?  How important is it that we catch ourselves?  Should we decide to......can we shift ourselves out of a group thought as individuals regardless of the mass?  Or, is it more important to play at shifting the whole? Would it be easy to shift or difficult or does it depend on how ingrained the thought it?  

Here are a few of the collective conscious thoughts I’ve recently recognized (in no particular order of importance).  

1. It’s a recession so as individuals and companies it’s a time to struggle financially.
2. It’s time to be sick (with a cold or flu).
3. People are scary.....don’t talk to strangers.
4. It’s important to test drive sex before making a commitment through marriage or sacred union.
5. Let’s be hairless or hairy (depending on the time period)
6. Negativity sales!
7. Eyesight goes bad around 40.
8. There is one person out there for me.
9. I am alone in this.  Nobody understand me.
10. Jesus is more God than the rest of us.

None of us are completely free of the collective consciousness.  Of the ones listed above, which ones have attached to you vs. which ones are you free from being a part?  Which ones do you consider good or bad?  Which would you like to shift?  Could a few of us decide together to play at shifting any of these that appear negative to something more positive?  How many people would it take?  Wouldn’t that be a fun experiment?

Tribute to Candace Silvers' FREE Fridays

Have you ever felt drawn or called to be somewhere even if it didn't seem very convenient?  That's how it was for me on the occasions I attended Candace Silvers' Free Friday Events (A Conversation About Possibility).  Although I knew the drive would be long and arduous, I figured if at least one thing was gained from attending it would be well worth it.  And, it certainly was, each time!

On one of those lovely days, she read the energy of the entire group and discussed relationships!  I am not sure of the actual words she used but will give to you what I gained from her talk.  She had us imagine that the room we were in was closed off to the rest of the world and we lived in a communal together.  She explained that each person would connect with their natural pair.  Typically it would start off as men and women getting together but eventually one of the genders would have more than the other.  Male or female - - those pairs would also match up with their natural partner.  It wouldn't be about being straight or gay or lesbian or bisexual.  It would be about being grateful to have someone (I know a few women who seemingly turned lesbian after divorcing and having kids - - maybe they simply found their natural pair and the gender didn't matter).

Candace went on to talk about how long ago when everyone lived in small communities/tribes/villages that there was no divorce.  The pairs simply made it work because they had to.  There was no option.  She talked about how today people remain together until one or both of the people stops making the other one feel good.  What would it be like if our society wasn't so concerned about feeling good?  What if all of us could give more selflessly to our spouses and/or special loved one?  Would it in turn be serving our families, friends, communities and world better as well?

I am not judging or saying that one way is right over another, it just seems to me that once natural pairs are made it would be easier to stay together.  Separating and divorcing can be so painful and not just to the couple....but to all of the around them.  I've experienced the latter and appreciate Candace's talk that helped give me perspective on a new possibility.

I could go on and on about the value gained from attending, especially regarding the two readings she did on me personally.  But for the sake of not making this about me......I say, thank you Candace, for being one of the many pivotal teachers who helped me shift to where I am today!  I honor you for the beautiful work you are doing.

Beauty

As my very dear friend and image consultant, Dora-Luz, reminded me through her eloquence ‘the beauty resides within each person.  The outside is an illusion that can change depending on how you want to express yourself at the moment.’  For example, do I want to let the sexy goddess be revealed or the sweet PTA mom?  Sometimes I even choose to combine them.

Some have referred to me as beautiful, others as fine or hot.  Even as I come to accept those as truths, I see the beauty that resides within each person, typically as easily as I see their own unique divinity.  Perhaps those are one in the same. I thought I recently heard someone think, ‘how could someone so hot being doing this healing work?‘ (side note - - of course, that could have been my imagination. But through various confirmations, I also know it is true that I am communicating telepathically more and more so maybe it wasn’t my imagination. In my reality, it doesn’t matter.)  I pray that thoughts such as those, imagined or not, do not bloat my ego or get in the way of the beautiful healing work I enjoy so much.  What one looks like...‘beautiful’ or ‘ugly’ or whatever has no bearing on what they can or cannot do; should or shouldn’t be doing.  I am also appreciative to feel somewhat protected from someone who would think such thoughts that could get in the way of this work.

I also pray that I stay genuine in knowing that the true beauty always comes from the inside out.  In the rare moments that I have accepted the outside beauty over the inside, life got very ugly for me and those around me.  People who had wanted to be around me because I had been helping them to feel better about their own lives through sharing what I term as God’s love with them; ended up feeling repelled by my own sense of momentary vanity and utter selfishness.  These are sad memories for me that include both men and women.  Thank God those moments are less extreme than ten years ago and hopefully they will be less and less with time until they are completely dissipated.  It is much better to attract and share God’s love with others than to repel with an unjustified and over-bloated sense of self.

I find that I am now on a quest to balance the new selfishness that is selflessness.  Taking care of myself as well I can to in turn take care of others better, in a way that is healthier and more well-adjusted for me and anyone that is part of my of life. It is with heart-felt gratitude that my life is surrounded by people who love me and who are so sharing and caring in helping to nurture this.  Yet it is a fine balancing act.  One to be tended to with care and prayer.

By Tonya Tyler